This is the second part of a series based on my experiences driving in New Jersey. For anyone who may not have been here, in New Jersey the 'rules of the road' are unique and I've learned some valuable lessons from many of these experiences behind the wheel. 

Before being an independent business professional I had been employed by several large corporations and I learned this lesson when I was commuting to one of them located in a large metropolitan city. My commute at the time consisted of a three-and-a-half-mile drive to the train station which would take approximately 15-20 minutes; and then about a 45-minute train ride to the office. Consequently, precise scheduling was necessary to get from my house to the train station; and if I missed the train I risked arriving late to the office.

Get Out of My Way

One morning, however, I learned a valuable lesson. When the alarm sounded this day, I decided I had plenty of time and procrastinated for an extra ten or fifteen minutes. However, things didn't go as planned that morning and, as a result I was running 'late.' Upon leaving the house I was rushing and feeling anxious. As I exited my driveway and proceeded to drive down the street, wouldn't you know it -- there was a car in front of me that must have been traveling at no more than 15-20 miles per hour (the speed limit is 35)!

Note: In my earlier entry, I mentioned I'm a strong extrovert and tend to 'converse' with the other drivers on the road (I don't think I'm the only person who does this.)

The Snail's Pace

As we 'crawled' down the streets of my home town at a 'snail's pace,' I proceeded to have a heated discussion with the driver of the car in front of me... well, let's just say I told them they were 'lacking intelligence' and did not possess 'good driving skills.' Don't they know that "I've got to get to the train station! Get out of my way!"

Finally! They're turning. But, wouldn't you know it; as soon as the first one turned and moved out of my path, another car driven by a 'less than intelligent person who didn't know how to drive' pulled out in front of me! I proceeded to let them know that they did not possess the intelligence to have a driver's license let alone the ability to drive on a public road. It seemed as if every time I got rid of 'one,' another 'one' got in front of me. I ranted on, "Why me? Why does this 'always' happen to me?"

Move It!

In addition to the aggravation these 'less than intelligent people who did not know how to drive' was causing me, the next challenge I encountered was a school zone. Sure enough, the crossing guard was holding up the little stop sign and I've got to stop and wait while the schoolchildren cross the street. I continued my rant; "What's with these kids today? Why are they so slow? Come on; you're young... let's go -- Move it!"

Surviving the 'Commute from Hell'

In spite of all these obstacles, by some miracle I was able to make it to the train station in a nick of time and boarded the train with only seconds to spare. When I finally got to my seat my heart was racing and I was out of breath. Even after surviving my 'commute from hell,' I was still feeling agitated and anxious about the ordeal even when I arrived at my office and it took me awhile before settling into my work routine. However, I felt aggravated that my day had gotten off to such a bad start. The rest of the day was non-eventful and I resolved that the next day I would make sure I left the house with plenty of time to spare.

Where'd They All Go?

The next day I left on time -- no procrastinating; just focusing on my morning routine. As I was driving along the same route I found myself wondering where all those 'less than intelligent people who didn't know how to drive' went? I also noticed when I came to the school zone that the schoolchildren didn't appear to be crossing the street as slowly as they did the previous day.

When The Student is Ready...

While I was pondering this... and asking myself, "Where'd they all go?" suddenly it was as if a miracle occurred... I had the insight that what was different was that I was on time. The day before I had been frustrated with myself for procrastinating and I took out that frustration by blaming the other drivers and the schoolchildren for my lateness. I was being reactive instead of proactive and accepting responsibility for my own behavior. Ironically; I realized, "I teach this stuff."

Who's Pointing at Who?

An old saying that's been a favorite of mine for many years is; "When you point a finger at someone else you've got three more fingers pointing back at you." This means I've got to look at myself and my behavior three times more than I look at someone else's.

Lesson Learned

The lesson I learned here was that even though I am a coach and educator, reactivity can creep up when least expected and, sometimes interfere with my personal and professional effectiveness. I still have human failings; however, I have tools to assist me in accepting responsibility for myself and my behavior instead of placing the blame on others. New skills and behaviors can be 'learned' and kept current. When learning new skills, a whole new world of opportunities can open up. Just as my reactivity caused me to have a rough start to my day, accepting responsibility can open a world of opportunities we might not even imagine could exist... if we are willing to take the risk and accept responsibility for ourselves.

This is the beginning of a series based on my experiences driving in New Jersey. For anyone who may not have been here, in New Jersey the 'rules' of the road' are unique and I've learned some valuable lessons from some of those experiences behind the wheel.

As a business professional I am also a member of the adjunct faculty of several colleges. As such, I travel around the state to the various campuses to teach. As a 'native New Jersian' I have my favorite routes as well as 'short cuts' around the problem traffic areas. In recent years, I've begun to rely on the GPS to keep up with traffic updates.

The Morning Commute

One morning while driving to class the GPS started giving me directions for unfamiliar routes. I started wondering what kind of malfunction might be occurring with the GPS and ignored them.

Note: I'm a strong extrovert and tend to 'talk back' to the GPS (I don't think I'm the only person who does this). I proceeded to have a heated argument with the GPS telling 'it' that "no way was I going 'that way'" and what was wrong with 'it' anyway?

The "Right Way"

As I was engaging in this argument with the GPS I took the exit to my preferred route and explained to the GPS that "this is the 'right way' to go." However, 'it' had the last laugh (if there is such a thing) because I discovered rather quickly 'why' these alternatives were being provided.

Not long after exiting the ramp onto my preferred route I found myself in a horrific traffic jam. It turned out that a terrible accident had occurred and all lanes in both directions were closed; the traffic was at a complete standstill.

Whose Fault is this, Anyway?

It was then that I understood... the GPS was not malfunctioning; it was really doing its job and providing me with alternatives to avoid this traffic nightmare in which I found myself. It was trying to warn me! I was the one who was not heeding the warning and was now 'kicking myself' for not doing so. Ah... the regrets of hindsight being 20/20!

When I'm stuck in traffic I have an opportunity to ponder what all this might mean and what lesson I might learn. It was then I realized I was resisting change. The GPS was doing its job by providing me with alternate routes around an obstacle in my path. The problem was not with the GPS; I was caught up in my own comfort zone and ignored the warning signs. I wondered how many other times I might have ignored warning signs or opportunities because I was stuck in my comfort zone and wanted to do things 'my way.' How many times did I get a 'nagging feeling in my gut' about a situation but ignored it only to have the very thing occur. How many times did I tell my self, "I 'knew' that was going to happen! Why didn't I (fill in the blank)?"

When the Student is Ready...

While I was pondering this... and saying to myself, "I teach this stuff!" suddenly, it was as if a miracle occurred. The GPS gave me directions to take the next exit! At first I thought to myself, "No way... I have no idea where that exit will take me and I don't want to be late for my class." However, the traffic was crawling along at a snail's pace, so I decided to take the exit. Then an amazing thing happened. The GPS directed me through the local towns, along back roads, side streets, up and down hills (I had no idea where I was) and before I knew it I was back on the highway on the other side of the traffic jam with a clear route directly to my destination.

What's the Point?

The lesson I learned was that even though I am a change agent, resistance can creep up when least expected and, sometimes create obstacles blocking my path. I still prefer to create a comfort zone; even if I don't realize it at the time. The questions I ask myself now that I think we all might want to ask are:

• Where is my comfort zone creating obstacles that block opportunities for future success?
• What would my business, organization, career, relationship or life be like if those obstacles were gone?
• What do I need to do outside my comfort zone to remove these obstacles?
• What's stopping me from doing it?

Lesson Learned

My comfort zone is just that; comfortable. However, when times change or obstacles block my path it might be necessary to break out of it. Those of us who don't change or adapt to changing times or circumstances will be left behind. New skills and behaviors can be 'learned' and kept current. When we learn new skills a whole new world of opportunities can open up. Just as the GPS brought me down unfamiliar roads, stepping out of our comfort zone can provide us with a world of opportunities we might not even imagine could exist... If we are willing to take the risk and step out of our comfort zone and onto unfamiliar paths. The rewards can be limitless.

The Challenge

Providing customer service can be a challenging job. The old adage: "The customer is always right," might cause a service provider to feel 'powerless' at times when attempting to meet customer expectations. Not all customers, however, are 'difficult;' they are merely attempting to satisfy a need for a product or service. 

According to Frederick F. Reichheld in his book The Loyalty Effect: The Hidden Force Behind Growth, Profits and Lasting Value, the cost of acquiring new customers is five times the cost of servicing established ones. In addition to that, according to the Technical Assistance Research Programs (TARP) from the White House Office of Consumer Affairs in Washington, DC, ninety percent of dissatisfied customers never return but tell at least nine other people about the bad customer service experience.

As a professional in the field of performance improvement my expectations for service excellence are high. For example, I expect service professionals to exhibit a 'spirit of service' along with a 'can-do' attitude as well as basic product knowledge and communications skills.

In my customer service program, I tell participants that "Customer Service is defined by the provider; however, customer satisfaction is defined by the customer." It is the customer who decides whether or not their expections of service are met... not the provider.

A Rainy, Foggy Night

Recently I had an experience of customer service that reaffirmed this for me. On a rainy, foggy night I was driving home at about nine-thirty when the 'oil' indicator light flashed 'on' and I knew the oil level needed to be checked right away.

Since the weather was awful, I thought I could stop at the local service station where I had been purchasing gas. The attendant always appeared very friendly and helpful so I thought surely, it would be no problem for him to check the oil in my car and add more if needed.

Upon driving into the station, I was happy to see him. As he approached my vehicle I asked, "Would you please check my oil for me?" Imagine my surprise when he abruptly responded, "No, I won't check your oil!"

Rather than engaging in an argument with him my reaction was just as was described in the TARP study. I immediately left and drove a short distance to another station where the attendant was friendly, knowledgeable and helpful. He checked the oil, which was low, added more and resolved the issue in under ten minutes.

A Small Investment in Time

Upon reflection of the experience I realized I patronized the first station not only because of the convenience or the prices, but because I felt good about the way I was treated and felt a sense of 'loyalty' to the local business. My expection that evening was that the attendant would check the oil and add more; (which, by the way, is a part of the job description of a service station attendant). This was not an unreasonable request, nor was I rude or demanding.

My immediate reaction was to leave and go elsewhere. However, in that moment I made a resolve to never go back again. In addition to that, by the next morning I told five more people about the incident. It took the attendant at the second service station no longer than ten minutes to grant my request... a small investment in time which will now secure my patronage.

The Cost of Retaining a Customer

It doesn't matter what kind of business you are in... whether you're an officer in a multi-million-dollar corporation, a service professional i.e., doctor, lawyer, accountant, etc., or the owner of a local 'mom and pop' convenience store; this is an important point and one must ask the question: "How many customers or clients am I losing every day because of customer dissatisfaction?" As mentioned above, the cost of acquiring new customers is five times the cost of servicing established ones. Customer loyalty is based upon the customer experience and the relationship of the customer with the service provider.

Happy, Satisfied Customers

Yes... a customer service job may be challenging at times. It's important, however, to remember... while the customer may not 'always' be 'right,' the customer is ALWAYS the customer. It's our job as a professional service provider to provide the type of service that makes them want to return and continue to bring us their business. If you do that the chances are you will have a clientele based on happy, satisfied customers who, not only will keep coming back, but will also be happy to refer your business to their family, friends and associates, thereby helping contribute to the success of your business.